Wow... what a year. It has been such a year that it has taken me a couple of days to begin this post. So much has happened major in my life this year that its hard to recap everything. I know it seems like Im lost more than Ive gained this year. And that is true. I lost a job, a spouse, a kidney, part of my bladder and weight. And while 1 one of those is a good thing the others I chalk as up they are gone and while Im still dealing with the aftermath of some of it, Im dealing. What have I gained? Lets see, a better job, friends, and since Jan 1, a relationship. So Im gonna roll with that.
A lot of people have asked if I have set a goal. Well obviously the first one is to find a place of my own. Drew and I need to get settled on our own, so thats number one on my list. As far as my health, Im taking it a day at a time. I know my function isn't the greatest and the infections will keep on coming but I trust my doctors to take care of me. Its just something Ive become used to.
Relationships.. well its been and up and down ride for me this past year. I went through my second divorce which is still a mystery and I have to admit it was hard. Then the first guy I went out with is the one I am currently with. We broke up, then stayed friends and now have started our relationship again. I have to say I didn't see it coming. With my luck, I figured it was over. But he threw me a curve ball and we are a couple again. And Im excited. And the fact that it happened on January 1st. He has taught me a lot. More than anyone will know or understand. He has taught me forgiveness, how strong I am, and how to deal with difficult situations. He is always there to calm me down when I start to stress out. And even better, he is my best friend. I can talk to him about anything and I know he's listens. Not everyone sees this, but I do. And thats what counts. And I like to think Im the same for him. I think we sort of support each other, like couples should do. Even we were just friends, he came to the ER with me and sat there and took care of me. He never thought twice. Thats what makes me smile. We have made a lot of memories and I really can't wait to see what its in the future for us. Its a brand new year, anything is possible. And its up to me to make that possible happen.
This year has taught me a lot too. Who to trust, who not to trust. How things can be blown way out of proportion and how much people can act like children sometimes. As far as family, well, learned quite a lot about that too. Its so hard when you can feel you trust people and then have it thrown it in in your face. And then it just gets too much. You know I always loved that our family was close and we had traditions. Well this year one was broken and without going into detail, its something I have to deal with and well people just need to learn to get over things and to keep to their ownselves.
It happens in every family and friends but I never thought it would happen for me. But its more on them than me and as the famous song goes, I "let it go". Thats what you have to do. Im happy and theres nothing anyone or anyone can say to take that away.
I have learned not to less stressful things take over my life. And that has a lot to do with my boyfriend. He has to be the calmest person I have ever met. And he is always there to remind me not to worry and things are going to be okay. Again, Im thankful for him in my life.
My health, well who knows? I never know from day to day what its gonna be like. Luckily my job is understanding enough when I have a appointments and if I get in the hospital they are not happy of course but understanding. Because we all know I just can't go in for 2 days ... its at least a week or more. And its horrible. I don't choose to go to the ER but when it comes and hits, I have no choice. And only having one kidney, I have to be a little more careful. Its not like I can let an infection get out of control and take my last kidney. Thats the last thing I need. And the last thing I need to worry about.
As far as everything from the past year, well if you had read my blogs, they haven't been the happiest. But Im looking to change that. If that means I have to stand up and fight for myself than I will. I have let too many people walk over me and let things go when I should have stood up for myself. And that is one goal I have.
As far as work, I love my job. Its hard work at times but I love the company and the people I work with. And given that they know about my health issues and work with me I couldn't ask for more. And Im finally getting to use my degree to a point.
Relationships... well we have already talked about that. I just to hope to keep it going. He makes me happy =)
So I hope everyone had a good 2014.. and an even better 2015!!
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