Monday, September 3, 2012

Well its a great day to be alive!


Now before you read there is one rule, if you a reading alone and I mean no other living this is around you, then you are dismissed from any of the future rules. But as for now, you shall read them in case that living thing happens to make an entrance.
If you are not alone and you are reading this to yourself, prepare to get some really strange looks from the people with you. And lastly, if you reading this out loud just have a secret contest in your head on who makes the strangest faces and who laughs when they shouldn’t. This will also help if you had my particular problem as I describe below. So this may altar the rules a tiny bit.  Im telling you people, if you will stick the game plan, everything will go smoothly.
            Lets start at the beginning. When I was 16, I was diagnosed with 2 kidney stones. (Now is where the rule starts, if you have had stones before, your frown face has started. Now frowns face yet? No kidney stones or you are just cold-hearted.. Ha-ha, I am only joking) they gave my pain meds and the next day, we drove in the snow and got them blasted. Yes they put on a big table (of course you are out of it) and they send shockwaves through the stones to break them up so they can pass easier. So then begins my adventure with stones. I will skip the rest. Only I am 30 now (I’m not old…. I’m not old… I’m not old…) and have had close to 60 now. Calcium buildup and I don’t pee as often. That’s the only thing we can come up with. Its pretty bad when you walk into an ER and they know who you are and I can tell the nurse exactly how to treat me, Then its on to the doctor to set up surgery to get them out. And then comes the word. The one word that I tremble everytime I hear it. Even getting ready to type it makes me gag…. The stent. The stent. Is a plastic tube that opens up the tube that goes from your bladder to your kidney so that any remaining segments can fall through without the patient feeling it? It hurts. Did I say it hurts? It hurts. Having it removed is even more fun. You are wide-awake while they put this cystoscope up, uhhh, you know where and clips and yank it out. (How many faces are people making now? How many people are looking at you? What is your spouse asking you at this moment) and then after some spasms…. You are back to normal UNLESS your name is Beth Anne. Then you get to go into septic shock and spend 9 days in the ICU and 3 in a regular room. You get to wear this fashionable PICC line to receive your meds in the morning. The good thing? Your energy is slowly getting back to normal, so you pretty much rely on everyone else to wait on you. LOL. I do feel bad but I have a wonderful support system.
            I had another surgery today to replace the stent on my left side, so another two weeks with that. I’m so darn allergic to everything that I can’t take any pills to fight whatever I had. All I know is it was BAD. My infectious doctor has nicknamed me Lazarus. (You know the man that Jesus raised from the dead) I had about 50 people lining up the waiting room waiting to say their goodbyes. (I asked 2 weeks later about this)
            So in all honestly, I feel humbled. I feel grateful. I feel alive. We had prayers being said for me all over the world. And believe me I could feel them. Those first days I was out, no I did not have an outer body experience. But even when visiting hours were over and there was nobody in there physically, I could feel something. There was no light, no angels, and no family members that had already passed. I explain it as a quiet yet peaceful time. I felt a presence. I was not alone and I liked those moments. They will be forever engraved in my head and my heart.
            I could tell you some funny stuff but for right now, we will leave it at that. The peaceful happy place. 

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